The Word Weaver
Inviting you to know & embrace Jesus Christ
Deb Weaver
"Abundance at Allume"
by The Word Weaver, Deb on December 7th, 2013

Receiving the opportunity to attend the 2013 Allume blogger’s conference was a priceless gift.  (Thank you, dear hubby!)   My earlier worries about entering a room filled with over 400 strangers evaporated in the warmth, encouragement, and love offered there. 
 
The entire conference was God-saturated.  We gathered to hear Holy Spirit-inspired messages, to connect with one another, to learn more about blogging, and to be challenged to give our lives and words to Someone bigger than ourselves.  The truths shared were profound and real; I learned far more than I’ll be able to share here.   We were given many physical gifts—in fact, I came home with twelve new books!  (I do believe that new books are a love language of mine!)  We were loved on and prayed over with tremendous passion.  There were divine appointments sprinkled throughout the weekend. 
 
The experience was abundance wrapped around and intertwining each participant.  Defining.  Challenging.  Affirming.  Empowering.  Life-changing. 
 
Though I have had wonderful, meaningful worship experiences (in groups, individually, one-on-one) and deep, loving connections with others, I have never before experienced such an intentional outpouring of lavish love, grace, friendship, prayer, and truth.  I returned home a river in flood stage, breaching all the banks.
Photo credit:   http://www.flickr.com/photos/chesapeakeandohiocanal/7074397109/, C&O Canal NHP, creative commons
I’d attended this conference hoping to learn more of God’s purpose in my life during this season.  While there, I heard God’s Voice in a variety of ways.  Often, one of the ways that I know that God is speaking specifically to me is when the same message resonates within me repeatedly over a short period of time.  This happened at Allume.  
 
Ann Voskamp, (author of One Thousand Gifts and The Greatest Gift—both life-breathing books), spoke, reminding us that “people who keep tally just want to know that they count.  When we live for an audience of One, you know you always count.”  For those times when we don’t feel we count, she encouraged us to slow down and look for the small moments in our days.  “The wise still.  It’s the only way to feel God’s embrace.” 
 
We need to live like growing “hatchlings who open wide their mouths so He can fill them.”  We need to recognize that “our hunger is a God-given gift.  It’s an appetite from God for more of God.  It keeps us alive if we’ll feed ourselves with that which makes us beautiful and satisfied rather than with that which makes us anxious.”  She gave an example—one that spoke personally to me—of how we feed ourselves with that which bankrupts us spiritually and mentally:  “the cyber circle”—check Facebook, “Am I known?”—check Twitter, “Am I known?”—check email, “Am I known?”—continue to spin. 
 
This hit home as I struggle with a lack of balance of giving/receiving online—sometimes from pure motives and lots of other times from wanting to be needed or known—which often pairs with procrastination.  I end up drained and tired with little time to accomplish some of the things to which I am called.  Instead, I need to recognize my hunger and allow the Presence, love, and Word of God to fill my soul with the only delicacies that satisfy.
The next night, Jennie Allen, (author of Restless which is in my “To Read” stack), spoke about how our lives looked cute and put-together but that she couldn’t get away from the impression that we were trapped in sin.  As she poured out her heart, all I could think about was my deep desire for approval from people, of wanting desperately to be liked and respected. 
 
The desire to be liked runs deeper than my desire to please God.  It causes me to say yes when I should say no. To listen silently or, worse yet, to join in a negative conversation instead of steering it in another direction.  To check Facebook repeatedly.  To drive myself and everyone around me crazy with perfectionism.  And it prevents me from accomplishing His purposes as I waste time and energy.  We broke into small groups to confess these sins to one another and to ask God to break the chains that hold us.
 
Afterward I wandered into the prayer room.  A woman, Rhonda, asked if she could pray for me.  She prayed and asked God that I would find my purpose—not in doing more, but in being His.  My roommate and new friend, Emily Pridgeon, later echoed this saying, “It’s not so much what we do or don’t do.  It’s more about seeking His face and letting Him strip away things.  We need to feed our hunger with Jesus.”  Though I agreed and wrote down her words in my journal, it wasn’t till Saturday night that these words sprang to life within me.
Saturday evening during worship with the David Walker band, I clearly sensed important truths that I needed to write down as we sang about the greatness of God. Suddenly, the things that had been said and the things that I'd realized throughout the weekend dove-tailed together so that I’d understand them more fully. 
 
*My first reaction had been to DO more—to seek Him, to stop filling myself with time wasters.  Yet He desires to fill me.  It’s something He does in me.  A teacup doesn’t fill itself.  It is filled. 
 
*I realized that I have many empty crevices where fear, anxiety, and selfish motives spring.  I need Jesus to flood my every crevice.  And though I desire to have Him overflow from me, it’s not possible if He’s not first flooding me.
 
* These empty places will destroy me and detour God’s purposes for my life if they’re not filled by Jesus alone.  Whatever God wants to do in and through my life  will not be accomplished if my every crevice isn’t filled.
 
*How can I pray for my children to be captivated by Jesus if I am not fully captivated by Him?  I am asking Him to give me a wholehearted devotion—to know and love Him increasingly.  I asked that this weekend would mark a complete difference in me and in my family.
 
I’m not sure if you’re keeping track, but that was the fifth time I’d heard this same message repeated in just a few days.  (Okay, okay, I hear you, Lord! )   I’m so glad that He loves me enough to make sure I get it.  He does this for all of us if we’ll pay attention.  He persistently, patiently pursues us! 
 
The following verses of Scripture have been on my mind lately:  “I pray that out of His glorious riches He may strengthen you with power through His Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith.  And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to GRASP how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.” (Ephesians 3:16-19, NIV)
May I come to Him—repeatedly throughout each day—and allow Him to remind me of His vast, unchanging, unconditional love.  Then I’ll be flooded to the measure of His fullness!  Then my empty places will be lush harbors of abundance to share with others.  May it be so!
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Copyright 2013, The Word Weaver, Deb Weaver


Posted in My Journey with God, Ministry Spotlight    Tagged with Allume, Empty, Flooding, God's Love, Transparency, People-pleasing


4 Comments

Brianna Wasson - December 7th, 2013 at 12:49 PM
Deb, I just keep thinking how thankful I am to count you a friend. How amazing God is to have called all of us to such deep understanding of His love and then to use us mightily for the sole purpose of making Him famous. However that plays out for all 400 women at that conference! So blessed by your words, my friend. Thank you.
The Word Weaver, Deb - December 7th, 2013 at 2:25 PM
Bria, thank you for reaching out to me! I loved getting to meet and spend time with you at Allume. It's exciting to watch how God is going to use this experience in each of our lives! You are precious to me!
Kim - December 9th, 2013 at 6:03 AM
Your words are a very sweet reminder of that amazing weekend, Deb. I especially love this: my empty places will then be lush harbors of abundance to share with others.
It was so nice to meet you there!
The Word Weaver, Deb - December 9th, 2013 at 11:01 AM
Thank you, Kim! I so enjoyed meeting you there too! May 2014 be a year of overflow and abundance!
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